I'm Ready for the Climax

People love the baseball analogy for sex, so I'm going to go in reverse for this one.

The playoffs, in Major League Baseball, is the orgasm or the climax to the season. There are only eight teams left and at any moment, with one swing or one pitch, drama can rain down (such is the beauty of the game).

The month-long climax begins tomorrow, when the Division Series for both Leagues starts.

What does that make the regular season then? The foreplay. And sometimes it's really awesome and you may even get off before you hit the real thing, and sometimes it's really boring, turning you off before you even think about the playoffs.

The latter was true for this year's baseball season. Sure, there were some "exciting moments," but those instances occur in every year.

The trade deadline is always exciting, and this one saw a pitching arms-race between two division rivals, the Cubs and Brewers. We all saw one whacko traded from Boston to Los Angeles (welcome home Manny Ramirez, Venice Beach should suit you well).

There were a couple of no-hitters, Francisco Rodriguez broke the single-season saves record, the Rays made the playoffs, Milwaukee tastes the postseason and, as of right now, the White Sox and Twins are battling for the final playoff spot.

But other than that, this season didn't have much oomph. It probably didn't help that my team, the hapless and batting-impotent Padres, finished in last place out in the NL West.

But even then, there have been plenty of shitty Padres seasons, but baseball has always piqued my interest.

So, why was this season so dull? Well, the Angels and Cubs had huge leads in their respective divisions, though the Cubs looked like they wanted to give that up at the end.

The Rays were a feel good story, but when even their own home town fans don't go to games, it's hard to get excited over them. We knew that the Mets were going to choke it all away again. And really, the Phillies in the playoffs? Boring.

It was nice to see the Yankees truly suck for once, but that took away from the most overhyped rivalry in sports. It also didn't help that the Red Sox owned New York this year.

And the NL West was the NL Worst once again. C'mon guys.

And the biggest buzz coming into the year was the Detroit Tigers and their uber-team that they assembled. Uhm, what happened there?

So, this season was a letdown. Kind of like that hot girl at the bar, only to...yeah.

But we're all at the climax. Let's hope the playoffs are more memorable than the regular season.